Handy Cell Phone   Reply to topic

So this guy goes into a bar and sits at the counter, ordering a beer.
He is there for a little while, talking with the bartender and other customers, when he puts his hand up next to his face and starts talking as if he is on the phone. After a few minutes he puts his hand down and resumes drinking his beer. The bartender looks at him and asks what he was just doing. The fellow says, "I have to spend so much time on the phone, I just had a cell phone implanted in my hand." After a few weird looks, everyone resumes their drinking.
Eventually, the fellow gets up and heads to the restroom. He is gone for quite some time, so one of the patrons suggests that the bartender check on him to make sure he's okay. The bartender opens the bathroom door and sees the guy squatting in the middle of the floor with a roll of toilet paper stuck up his butt. The bar tender says' What the hell are you doing?" The guy says, "Waiting for a fax."